Cricket in a Biscuit

Last night, I was knocking out another chapter of, You Are A Badass; How to Stop Doubting Your Inner Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life, by Jen Sincero. At some point I must have transitioned from reading to staring into space prompting Darren to ask, "What are you thinking, Momma?" "Mmmm… I might not be a badass. I just don't feel an inner greatness." Lately, I've been having a bit of a crisis of confidence, why are we all here, kind of moment. My whole life, I've known where I want to end up. The road there, however, has never been clear. Also, I wasn't entirely sure if Darren was pointed in the same direction. We had talked about it years ago, but time has a way of changing things. Lack of funds has a way of tossing up roadblocks as well. Darren is working now — which is such a great development for us, but it's going to be a slow build back. Now that he is done with training and on a regular schedule, things should improve in ...

Three years ago, I wrote an excited post about spinning for leopard print mittens. I spun the yarn almost immediately, and then it sat… and sat… and sat.  Enough was enough, Tuesday, I decided; it was time. I wound the skeins and cast on. I knit almost an entire mitten that day, only to remember why the project had been sitting so long.  The original idea had been to make a pair of these felted mittens. I've made them before, and they're super warm and cozy. The problem was, I wasn't sure I'd get the color play envisioned when I started the yarn. Then I made the mistake of looking at mittens online. I found a pattern that would probably do exactly what I wanted, but it was out of print. So, I remained mired by indecision for three years.  I started knitting happily enough. But then there were stripes, and more stripes. No spots, just very regular, un-leopard-like stripes. Hmmm.  While the pattern for the other mitten is out of print, the stitch pat...

Let me tell you about this kid, my Laney Bug. She is the quietest of the bunch, so sometimes she's drowned out by all the noise. She needs me the least, so sometimes I forget she does  need me. Let me tell you something else about this kid. She is all heart.  The kids each have a little treasure box, a place to put their found objects, small trinkets with value only they can understand. Yesterday Laney asked me if I knew which thing in her treasure box made her the most sad. I was a little surprised she would keep something that made her sad, and had no idea what it could be.  When we went up for bath, she showed me what it was, a tiny turtle bead she had found, about as long as a grain of rice. It was cute. I asked why it made her sad. Her voice caught and her eyes welled up. She was worried the person who lost it might still be looking, unable to find it. The thought was almost too much to bear.  Sometimes I think she feels what others feel more ac...